Ariel Leve
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Watching all the fires in California I was asked by a friend, “What would you save if your house burned down?” Not much. There’s nothing I can’t live without. Thinking about this I couldn’t figure out - was this incredibly Zen, or incredibly sad?
There’s really only one thing that I am attached to. A few weeks ago, I had a scare and I realized how much it mattered. My plane had just landed at JFK. An announcement was made that it would be a while before we could disembark so I turned my phone on and made some calls.
As I exited the aircraft and walked to immigration, I was still talking, following the crowd.
Standing there, amiably breaking the rules by chatting illegally on my cell phone in the immigration line, I wondered why wasn’t my shoulder aching the way it usually does? Then it hit me: I had left my laptop on the plane. Panic. I hung up and instantly sprinted back to the gate.
Anyone who’s ever landed in the JFK international airport knows that the distance between immigration and the gate where the plane arrives is often longer than the flight itself. And I was flying. Like a gazelle in my natural habitat. Only without the gracefulness.
It was late at night and the terminal was completely empty. I saw a security officer and I yelled out: “You have to help me! Please!” I was too winded to get the rest of the sentence out.
When I caught up to him I explained what happened. But I was so out of breath he could barely understand. He told me he would accompany me to the plane. “Please… walk faster…” I said, the entire way.
All of my writing is on my computer. I rarely print anything out and, I don’t back things up. “You don’t understand,” I said, “That computer is my life.” Julius kept nodding. He looked like he wished he hadn’t stopped.
We reached the plane and the cleaning crew was on board; they wouldn’t let me enter. So Julius explained and when he was done I repeated everything he said as if I was translating. Even though he had spoken English. “It’s an Apple laptop” I said. “It’s my life.”
I couldn’t stop saying this.
Julius and I waited as they searched. Five minutes later when they returned they were empty handed. They announced it must have been stolen.
You’d think someone had died. I was hysterical. We immediately began power-walking back towards immigration. He was trying to reach his supervisor but now there was no reception. While he was trying to do this, I was manically instructing him to try again.
“They have to make an announcement…” I said, as I envisioned someone hailing a cab outside the terminal with my computer under their arm. “Tell them to make an announcement.”
By the time we got back to the immigration line, we’d been gone nearly half an hour. The line hadn’t moved. I’m breathless, sweating.
“Has anyone taken my computer?? I shout. “Has anyone seen it?”
People are shaking their head. It’s become a situation.
Julius tells me I have to get in the line to go through passport control but I can’t move. He heads off to speak to someone on the other side. People are saying nice things to me but I can’t focus. All I can think is that if my laptop is gone, I have no idea what I’ll do. Just then as he returns, I see that under his arm is my computer. I run towards him, and give him a hug. He doesn’t hug me back. But I can’t let go.
At that moment, I felt more grateful then I’ve felt in a long time. So grateful, I start crying. I let go of Julius and move to the end of the line and there is a woman with an infant in front of me. “It was like losing a child,” I say. She gives me a disapproving look. “It’s not the same.” So I revise my statement. “For me, this is like my child,” I say. But I can tell she’s not interested. I considered momentarily debating this but then I decided she wouldn’t get it.
More on this subject on Ariel's blog
Ariel Leve writes for The Sunday Times Magazine, specialising in investigative features, in-depth interviews and a humorous weekly column, Cassandra. She was awarded Feature Writer of the Year by the British Magazine Design & Journalism Awards in 2008 and in the same year Highly Commended in the British Press Awards, for which she has twice been nominated. Her book, The Cassandra Chronicles, will be published by Portobello Books August 6th (UK) and HarperPerennial (US and Canada) March 2010. Click below to read her Cassandra column
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Bethnall Green, I feel the same: it was the first thing I read in The Sunday Times.
Sundays will never, ever be the same!
Desolate of Derbyshire, Derby, UK
Oxygen?
Kidd Garrett, Bristol, UK
Ariel,
Presumably you have a broadband connection? Get someone on The Times' IT staff to recommend an on-line backup service for you. For about US$50 per year copies of everything you keep on your computer are also securely stored somewhere else. If you ever lose your laptop then you get a new one, log on to the back-up site and download your electronic life. The backup goes on in the background while you work. Once its first set up you barely notice it. For me it is a revelation, getting rid of the worry about losing a laptop. Now it would only be an inconvenience, not a catastrophe.
Iain Thorpe, Wellington, New Zealand
Ariel + Sunday Times =Sunday papers. You don't know what you are missing until after it is gone. The discovery of something human, another person who struggles with modern living, modern rubbish, out of the maelstorm creating beautifully crafted sentences. Its a plot against the literary. I have liked to be a wasp in the room when this decision was taken, i would buzz and sting the ears of those responsible for this decision. Maybe, I'll switch to the grauniad or torygraph next weekend.
Despondent of Bethnal Green, London,
I tend not to back things up but I get around this by always emailing important stuff to myself at gmail or talk21, you should try it. It would enable you to work anywhere on your scripts etc without taking a very expensive computer with you, just a cheap model to access the Internet.
Steve Byrom, Southport, UK
For God's sake, back up your files if they're that important to you! Sooner or later it'll die and now you know how you'll feel!
This was your wake-up call. If you're going to be a computer user, back up your files. It's part of the job.
Jon, Winchester,
In one moment, one second, your entire life can change. All the things "you can't live without" meaning materialistic possessions are forgotten in a second when you think something has happened to your child or anyone you love. Wouldn't most people give up their precious earthly possessions to have "one more minute" with someone they have loved and lost to death?
Its JUST stuff. We need to get past it and appreciate real life, whatever THAT is!
Janet, Belle Haven, VA, USA
CASSANDRA is a must for every Sunday Times magazine. Ariel is thoughtful, provoking with some tremendous articles again and again. It is the first thing I used to read in the Sunday Times, even before the sport pages !
The message to the Editor of the ST magazine is publish Ariel every Sunday.
A further message to Editor of The Times, please publish the great Cassandra articles on a daily basis.
Alistair Newman, London, U K
Please bring Ariel back to the magazine.
Shade, London,
ariel -- it's not the same, but i can guess how you must have felt in order to actually say this to a mother and child.
robert furlong, prescott, AZ
Well I know there are plenty of things we - as humans - can 'live without'.
I have this personally experienced as a young boy.
We have a big family and mainly for that reason we were poor, and as children we were normal active children.
Playing together, fighting, enjoying, living together.
We were despite the hardship a happy family and were used to doing without, and being without.
This has I feel made us strong willed and fairly determined.
We were however showed and had the love of our parents, and if I am honest there is one thing human beings cannot do without - and that is love.
So I'll gladly do make do without many other things.
If I am 'pushed' on something other it's Music and Manchester United!!
Jospin van Orly , Amsterdam,
I think it is an absolute discrace that old people in England have to pay for nursing care at home when it is free in Scotland and not means tested.and the English Parliament subsidises Scotland .People can come in from abroad and avail of our medical services free of charge and we seem unable to care for our old people without them using up their savings .These are people who have worked here all their lives and when in old age they need care they havee to use up their savings. I think this should be addressed most urgently.
m e Snell, wimbledon, London
Well, in today's world this is all I can comment on the quote :
"There is nothing I can live without" is true for today's world as far as I can conclude.
However the Human should have the mindset that there is nothing in the world without which he/she can't Live. Man can survive with the help of just natural gifts given by god to mankind and he need nothing in this world apart from those five things, the air, water, land, fire.
There are such human in this world these days as well...find them out and know them..you will find there company peace full and relieving as well.
thanks,
Jain
Mjain, Delhi, India
It's incredible someone can feel she couldn't live without her laptop. Please, think where technology is driving us.
Daniel, Vigo, Spain
great writing. I feel the sense of panic on loosing something precious. Please bring Ariel back to the magazine !!
Mario H, London,, UK
We cannot live without honeybees. Dying out at a rabid rate, they are more important than just about anything. Their plight is largely ignored by those in the fashion industry, governments at war, and major artists, to name a few.
Lavendier Myers, Peaks Island, Maine USA
'There's nothing I can't live without' ..... well, try going without food, water and money for a while and see how you get along.
JohnM , Stromeferry, UK
When we were small, Mum showed us where she kept one briefcase (containing vital documents) and one box (containing negatives for all family photos)--which we were to take as we flee in case of fire. Everything else, she explained, can be replaced.
J Michael, London/New York/Tokyo,
Your description of sudden loss, the blinding adrenaline panic of it, has left me in need of a defibrillator. Fantastic writing. So pleased you found it, and writing as a mother I can assure you that it sounded JUST like losing a child. Seeing your laptop tucked under the security guy's arm must have felt identical to seeing your child holding his hand.
You have really taught me something: I must back up my laptop files.
Annie, Emsworth, Hampshire
Reading Ariel's Cassandra was one of the highlights of my Sunday Times afternoon enjoyment - I appreciate it is important to move things forward but did you really have to remove it from print to show it online?
Just seems a shame.
Rebecca Perry, London,
I always look forward to reading your column in the magazine - but now no longer! I will have to have my computer fired up on a Sunday when I get the papers now so I can catch up. This is a shame as I am not as attached to my Apple laptop as you are and I like a break from the very small screen at the weekends. Hope you'll be back in the paper soon, but I'll just have to keep the laptop close!
Nicola, Oxford, Oxfordshire