Tad: Why are women so dishonest?

Molly: Oh, here we go... What's brought on the bitter lemonry this time?

Tad: I just read another one of those surveys in which women rate what they look for in a man. Sense of humour is in top spot - again - when that's patently untrue.

Molly: Maybe your sense of humour isn't delivering for you, Tad, but being funny, and I mean really funny, wins women over every time.

Tad and Molly: is it OK to flirt on Facebook?

He says: Social Networking sites are a harmless place to flirt. She says: No, they're a stalking mechanism

BACKGROUND

• Should Prince William marry Kate Middleton?

• Tad & Molly: Why do women go for men who behave badly?

• Tad & Molly: why women are sluts and men are studs

BACKGROUND

• Should men be paid more than women?

• Baldness or menopause?

Tad: Easy on the insults, tiger. Sense of humour is my strong point. Some would say that's all I've got. But I'm not talking about myself. In general, you don't see supermodels rubbing themselves up and down the funniest men they can find.

Molly: So how do you explain unions such as Britt Ekland and Peter Sellers, or Woody Allen and Mia Farrow, then? Or Drew Barrymore and Tom Green? Heck - Bruce Forsyth is actually married to a former Miss World.

Tad: Because they're RICH... except maybe Tom Green. And Barrymore dumped him as soon as he proved to have no earning potential whatsoever.

Molly: I give up. Are you honestly saying that when you see Britt Ekland or Mia Farrow, women who could have anyone they wanted, you STILL think they are primarily motivated by dimes and dollars?

Tad: I'm not saying being funny counts for nothing at all. But looks and money are the cake, while a sense of humour is just the icing.

Molly: You couldn't be more wrong. Women are attracted to alpha males. A man can achieve alpha-dom through pretty much any sphere - sports, business, politics, show business - and there will always be a critical mass of women who are drawn to him like iron filings to a magnet. It even applies to the stars of academia. Stephen Hawking ended up in a love triangle, for goodness' sake. But I don't think that any form of success can beat the charisma factor of making people laugh. And unlike money or position or fame, the jokes keep on coming.

Tad: Um... OK. I'm a little perplexed that you used Stephen Hawking as an illustration of funny. But here's my point: sense of humour is not the top, number one, most important attribute women look for. That would be security.

Molly: Who are these hordes of women you have identified who rate security over having a good time? And security from what? Outside a jungle or a war zone, security doesn't count for much - especially if that source of security is free to leave you for someone else.

Tad: You're kidding me. For every one beautiful woman who's married to a funny man, I can point out another 50 who are married to rich, unfunny men.

Molly: But that's a matter of statistics. It is easier to get rich than it is to be truly, charismatically funny. I also think that having a genuinely quick wit is an even rarer trait in women than it is in men - which is part of the reason women are so attracted to funny guys.

Tad: Or a sought-after attribute in a friend who can keep you entertained until you see someone you fancy. Teenage girls don't put up posters of Orlando Bloom because they think he's hilarious. And groupies don't clamour around Enrique Inglesias's dressing room door because they hear that he tells a cracking after-dinner story. Women don't want to roll in the aisles. They want to roll in the hay.

Molly: But finding someone funny is the first step to wanting to roll around in bed with them. Pubescent girls have a notoriously weakly developed sense of comedy and sex appeal (hence the fact that talentless Orlando Bloom has an acting career), so let's remove them from the equation. Real women find nothing sexier than walking into a restaurant where a guy is holding a table of his friends agog with some witty anecdote.

Tad: Look. Sense of humour is not totally unimportant. I'm just saying that women are being dishonest when they put it at the top of the list time and again.

Molly: You're wrong, of course. But do you consider men to be any more honest about their priorities?

Tad: Yes. Men consistently put “physical attractiveness” at the top of the list of what they look for in women. Men and women are equally shallow - the difference is that men admit it. Teenage boys don't plaster their walls with pictures of Angelina Jolie in a wet bikini and then pretend that it's because they admire her charity work.

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