Question: How do you tell a friend that she has had too much cosmetic surgery? My friend has had little procedures for a few years but now she seems to have crossed a line and is looking grotesque.

Geraldine, 44

Jerry Hall: God, the number of people who go in for a little light Botoxing and, a couple of years later, are then having everything north of their ankles hoiked upwards and pulled tight. It’s the curse of our times and, honey, there really is nothing you can say. Imagine your friend had put on a little weight; would you feel that it was fine to tell her that she was fat? No, I hope you would smile sweetly and tell her how fabulous she looked.

It’s the same story with all her nipping and tucking. What will you achieve? She has already done it, it helps her to feel good and, besides, it will have cost her a fortune. In my experience, good advice isn’t always the most welcome, no matter how you try to dress it up. As we say in Texas, you can put your boots in the oven but that doesn’t make them biscuits.

Growing old gracefully is a wonderful phrase but, hell, who doesn’t want to avoid the old bit if they can help it? Unfortunately, a trout pout and wearing one’s breasts as earrings is not the way to go about it. For some people, the temptation to try to be the youngest, prettiest one in a room even in their fifth or sixth decade is a way of fighting time — an unequal match if you ask me, but they can’t help themselves.

If you want to help your friend, maybe you could try subtly building up her self-esteem. Her surgery is an outward sign of inner unease and I have seen it become a bit of an addiction among some worn-down women as they find more and more to dislike about their appearance. You may not be able to do anything about the work she has already had done, but you could try to distract her from having any more. Try to make time for her, doing new things, because the surest way of staying youthful is to be vital and enthusiastic and to have an appetite for life.

Most important of all, make sure that she knows that you value who she is rather than the way she looks.

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