How many times have you heard a woman, referring to her voracious highlights habit, breezily observe, “I don’t know what my natural hair colour is any more. . .”? Well, in my case, that of a confirmed tanorexic, I can no longer vouch for the original hue of my birthday suit. For the past half-decade I have been obsessed with achieving the perfect year-round “glow”, a slave to the St Tropez, a card-carrying bottle bronze — and proud of it. My natural skin colour? Probably, like many British Caucasian women, a kind of plucked-chicken pink.

Now, however, as we segue into autumn/ winter 2008, a season in which goth and grunge are the buzz words — and the threat of recession is turning our thoughts to more more puritanical beauty routines — my “tan” is beginning to look as outmoded as last season’s It bag. And while the pursuit of the perfect tan gets even more dizzyingly absurd — the latest craze being the illegal “tan in a needle” Melanotan, an injectible hormone purchased over the internet that encourages a “natural” tone — I think the time has come for me put down the fake bake and rediscover my inner pallor.

I don’t feel I’m going bravely into the tan recession alone. Victoria Beckham and Cheryl Cole, previously poster girls for the permatanned, have toned it down of late, and trendy young things Daisy Lowe, Alexa Chung, Kelly O et al just wouldn’t be seen dead with that telltale orange hue. Cole’s flame-haired bandmate Nicola Roberts recently filled four whole pages in Heat magazine with revelations that she is “over trying to be a tanned, pretty commercial girl”, and how liberating it has been to embrace her natural colouring, while the LA babe Mischa Barton confessed at a Herbal Essences event (she is the new face of the brand from January) that her only beauty disasters had come courtesy of “fake tanners — I hate the stuff!”.

Our love affair with the deep-bake look began, according to the make-up artist Charlotte Tilbury, with the seminal Kate Moss “castaway” editorial that she and the photographers Mert Alas and Marcus Piggott shot for Vogue in 2002. “We created a deep, layered tan on Kate, a look that was replicated on her in campaigns for Cavalli, Louis Vuitton and Missoni.” After that, she says, “everybody started doing it — but badly”. And then it got even worse, as it became a look mainly associated with plastic nails and hair extensions. “The backlash is going to be huge,” she predicts.

It’s already beginning. One of the most visible examples of this is the recent signing of pale-skinned beauties Sophie Ellis-Bextor — one of a tiny group that Tilbury describes as “blue-white”, meaning she has the kind of skin that will never tan — and the flame-haired Lily Cole to represent the Rimmel brand alongside Kate Moss.

Still, I’m a serious tanorexic, as are millions of British women. Gradual tanners (for which the UK is the largest market in Europe) account for an estimated £22m in sales per year, with 30% of women indulging in the habit. But we’re behind trend. In the States, sales of what they call sunless tanners started dropping in 2006.

Going cold turkey for me means forsaking my morning L’Oréal Nutrisummer ritual, which is more difficult than it sounds, as the very real threat of living with a pair of thighs resembling uncooked sausages looms large. But at least I’m not alone. As I also consign my trusty Benefit You Rebel tinted moisturiser to the back of the bathroom cabinet, I realise that hangovers are going to look, and therefore feel, far worse. Just what am I letting myself in for? Over the days that follow, watching the remnants of my tan fade to oblivion, I realise that I’m going to need help with the beauty — and fashion — conundrums that have been thrown into focus as a result of my chasing that porcelain complexion.

First port of call for advice on how to properly rock my natural (okay, yes, pink-tinged) hue, is Style’s in-house beauty expert Joanna McGarry, who herself channels an edgy take on 1950s pin-up glamour. McGarry realised early on that she was incapable of getting a tan, and so has let her naturally powder-puff complexion dictate her left-field style. She believes there are advantages in forgoing a tan. “First, you can play around with fashion without looking like a footballer’s wife who’s got it wrong,” she says, helping to strengthen my resolve. “Imagine Roisin Murphy with a tan — it just wouldn’t work.”

She also asserts that “the Wag tan look, defined by excessive fake tanning, a French manicure and lashings of lip gloss, is unbelievably ageing”. And the strange thing is that photographs of me proudly flaunting my fresh Ibiza tan at a friend’s quintessentially English country wedding this summer seem a testament to this. Next to the other guests, I look bizarrely mature for my age — and yet, conversely, about as sophisticated as a popsicle.

Further moral support comes from Simon Doonan, creative director of Barneys New York department store and the author of Eccentric Glamour, a guide to “creating an insanely more fabulous you”. According to Doonan, “every trend has a sell-by date, and the fake tan thing definitely expired this year. What once looked healthy and lush now looks cheesy and has baaad connotations”. Such as? “Well, I associate a tanned look with skin cancer,” he says, pulling no punches. “But, really, it’s the fake thing. Centuries ago, women used powdered lead to whiten their faces. It made them ill and is just as loony as hosing yourself with tangerine fake tan.”

And it’s this anti-extremes attitude I’m beginning to realise is key to the pale look. Rather than aspiring to a ghostly bone white, the new pallor is all about the natural look, a kind of pared-down beauty that needs no artifice. Except, of course, for a slash of bright red lipstick, which is a beauty treat the new, fair-skinned me can carry off with panache. And which made the old, tanorexic me look like trash.

So, it’s time to be sophisticated and chic. As long as my thighs can remain under wraps (until next summer’s Ibiza excursion, that is), I think I could get used to this.

How to be pale and interesting

Keep your pale skin gleaming with a radiance-boosting tinted moisturiser or it can look dull and lifeless.

Lose the bronzer and invest in a pretty pink blusher: pale girls can’t go anywhere without a touch of rouge.

Search high and low to find the perfect foundation for your natural skin tone. Chanel does pale well.

The right hair colour is crucial to making pale skin work for you. Get a free consultation at a good salon — it could revolutionise how you look.

A universal rule, but particularly for the lighter-skinned girls, is to make sure your moisturiser packs an SPF of at least 15. Better yet, apply a sunscreen every morning to keep your skin looking plump and youthful.

Joanna McGarry

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