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I usually get up about 7.30. Sometimes Bluebell wakes me up and we’ll chat for a while and then go downstairs and have breakfast. For me it’s usually egg on wheat-free toast, fruit and a big mug of camomile tea. Bluebell loves eggs
too, so she often has the same. And of course Daddy gets his biscuits, but patiently waits to see what else might come his way. He’s five now and really loving and protective towards Bluebell. Like his owner, he also loves attention, though! But I think he still gets plenty of that. If I’ve got a free morning, I’ll chuck on some leggings or tracksuit bottoms and head out to the park with both of them. With a hat and sunglasses I can usually get away without any make-up.
By 10 I’ll have had a chat with my PA about my day’s schedule, which has been pretty busy. I’ve just finished writing a series of children’s books. They’re based on the adventures of Ugenia Lavender, a little girl who’s quite defiant and frustrated with her lot, because she finds it hard to fit in. I suppose I was a bit like that — always trying to fit in, thinking I was different from the other kids because I had a Spanish mother, an older father.
I also remember feeling we didn’t have much: holidays, toys, clothes... Mum used to get ours from jumble sales — even my knickers. But she worked hard and I have a lot of respect for her. I cherish her.
When I got the book deal, it was a huge turning point for me because it was basically a publisher saying he had confidence in me as a writer. Just before I joined the Spice Girls, I was studying English at college and my teacher thought I had a lot of potential, so to get this opportunity to write has been amazing. I’m now working on the audio books, so if I’m taking a day for that, Mum usually comes and looks after Bluebell while I head off in the morning to a recording studio in west London.
I love acting and doing funny voices, so it’s been a real treat to do it myself.
Wherever I am at lunchtime, I usually have something like sea bass, with a green and tomato salad with oil and vinegar. If I’m in the studio I’ll bring it with me, and then I’ll carry on until 4 or 5. If I’ve got a free day, there’s always plenty to do around the house. The other day, Bluebell and I went off up to Ikea to get some shelves and then came back in the afternoon and watched The Wizard of Oz. I was worried she’d be frightened of the Wicked Witch, but she wasn’t, and she loved the Munchkins — she kept jigging around the room to them. Sometimes it’s the simple things I love doing with her, like sitting on the swings in the garden. It’s those kinds of times that I feel like a child too. It reawakens that sense of wonder, of innocence.
Of course, life can throw things at you that can shatter that picture. Something that had the most profound effect on me was the death of my father. I’d just turned 21. He had a heart attack. It changed my outlook completely. It made me realise my own mortality, how little time we have on Earth. It gave me this kind of “death energy”, this drive to go out and do something with my life. At the same time I felt isolated, even embarrassed, because my peers didn’t know how to comfort me. But life works in mysterious ways. At the time I was working as a game-show host in Turkey, and two months after his death I replied to an advert for a girl band… The rest is history.
Like any two-year-old, Bluebell has her routines, and she has her dinner at 5.30. I’ll then bath her — sometimes I’ll jump in with her — and then we read stories in bed. One of her favourites is Snow Bear, about a little bear who can’t find his way home. If I’m in for the evening, I might heat up a dish my housekeeper cooked earlier or order in sushi — California rolls, seaweed salad and sashimi. If I’m not doing anything, I love nothing better than curling up on the sofa with a good book. At the moment it’s Kate Mosse’s Labyrinth. I’ll also try and fit in a yoga session.
The other night, though, I went out with some girl friends. We spent the evening in a local restaurant talking about the new Sex and the City movie. I’ve seen it twice already. It pushed all the buttons — made me laugh, made me cry. To be honest, I felt quite traumatised by it all. I think I’m quite sensitive when it comes to engaging with other people’s energies and emotions. And yet it’s things like characters in books and films that help me work out my own stuff in life. The film lifted the lid on relationships, particularly any notion I still had about the fairy-tale fantasy! In a way, seeing the four women in Sex and the City and how the story of their lives has moved on reminded me of the Spice Girls and how we’ve moved on. The Spice Girls reunion tour was a very healing experience for me. It put to bed every bit of doubt, guilt, insecurity I had about leaving the girls when I did. I felt I’d made amends with them, come away with a sense of completion about that chapter in my life.
Before I go to bed, I check the doors and check on Bluebell. My bedroom’s very simple, uncluttered, nothing to make me think of anything other than sleep. It’s my birthday on Wednesday and I really feel I’m where I want to be right now — on so many levels. But, of course, as much as I want to control things in my life, I’ve no idea where I’ll be in 10 years. For now, though, I feel complete. Maybe that’s all that really matters.
Interview by Ria Higgins. Portrait by Ivor Prickett
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