THE OLDIES ARE THE GOLDIES

People Like Them was surprised and glad to go away on holiday and return to find that guest-list culture and £2,000 jeroboams of Cristal have given way to a new era of abandon and impropriety — led by those old enough to do it best. At the Frieze Art Fair in Regent’s Park, Lucian Freud’s muse, Sue Tilley, was spotted ram raiding the VIP section, instead of waiting to be asked in.

At the opening of his Design Museum exhibition, the artist Alan Aldridge, father of Saffron, cranked up Beatles songs far above acceptable levels. Then there was a debauched evening in Richmond chez Nicky Haslam, of which the less said the better. And look at this picture of that old pro Bryan Ferry. From that innocent look on his face, I bet you’d never have guessed that he later persuaded Eva Herzigova and friends to dance with him into the small hours in a hidden room at the back of the Mayfair eatery Automat. Me neither.

KNOW YOUR RIGHTS

Meet the fashion icons of the new era. I spotted this merry band of climate protesters (intentionally or not channelling Luella’s autumn 2008 Edwardian suffragette look) outside the House of Commons recently. It was the 100th anniversary of Emmeline Pankhurst’s “rush” on parliament, and the girls, along with hundreds of WI members, yummy mummies and Rosie Boycott, were shouting “Deeds not words!”, doing pirouettes and handing out fairy cakes. They were such a stylish baked-goods movement that I have decided, henceforth, to follow them. Expect to see more cake activism — and me wearing Luella — on the barricades soon.

ROYAL FLUSH

At times like this, one should cultivate as many friendships with the wealthy as possible.

So to Sloane Street, for the opening of Princess Marie-Chantal of Greece’s children’s-wear store. There were Trinny and her little girl, plus Camilla Rutherford, with little Hector and Maud. And there, among £150 silk smock dresses, the most darling smoked-salmon sandwiches and the shiniest of European aristocrats, I found myself, quite understandably I thought, not wanting to leave.

RETAIL THERAPY

So we have to be more careful about what we buy. Well, don’t get carried away, girls. It took three visits to the Isabel Marant shop before I felt calm enough to hand over 100 smackers for my expensive new sweatshirt. Since then, the slogan “Mr Hatman wishes you a nice day” has brought so much cheer to those around me, I feel the top has paid for itself in karma points many times over. Shopping: it’s your public duty.

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