Kathy Brewis
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Suicide is far from painless, both for the people who do it and for the ones they leave behind. The cluster of seven suicides in Bridgend, south Wales, has left scores of grieving relatives and friends and the rest of us stunned at the thought that these young people – some pictured partying just days earlier – could take their own lives.
Disturbingly, the town’s teenage population seem less surprised by the tragic events. Below a steady drizzle, a group of teenagers outside a Bridgend off-licence discuss their dead friend Natasha Randall, the most recent in the series of suicides to have afflicted the town and the only girl. Their rationale is shocking.
“Perhaps she just got bored,” says Aaron, a 17-year-old in a hooded top and trainers. “It’s depressing living here. There’s nothing to do and we’ll never get decent jobs. The best I can hope for is to carry on stacking shelves at Tesco.”
Already two other teenagers have tried to end their lives and 12 pupils at a comprehensive school are on suicide watch. Dan-ielle, a 16-year-old in a white tracksuit, says: “Kids round here have been drinking, smoking dope, taking ecstasy and having sex since they were 13 or 14. By the time they reach my age they’ve done everything. The combination of booze, drugs and the boredom of living around here screws young people up so much that they think killing themselves will be exciting.”
“We know young people can get things out of proportion,” says Anne Parry, chairwoman of the charity Papyrus which aims to prevent teenage suicide. “They feel things more passionately and they are more impulsive and that can be dangerous. They don’t always associate suicide with being dead for ever.” Papyrus is run by people who have lost children to suicide, who know first-hand the devastation that it brings.
“Suicide is always shocking,” says Parry. “But it is a fact of life. It’s no good thinking this won’t happen in your family. Sadly, it does. No family is immune. As a society we have to ask ourselves: is there enough support around this young person? What can we all do to stop this?”
What makes a teenager turn to suicide? There are no easy answers and cases vary – one youngster might kill himself apparently out of the blue while another talks about it obsessively for months beforehand. But there are common factors.
“A suicidal teenager feels hopeless. They often feel no one cares about them, perhaps even that it would be better for everybody if they weren’t there. If a young person is feeling suicidal they must confront that head-on and seek help.”
If the right sort of help is not on hand, teenagers might be encouraged further towards despair and death. There are numerous internet sites where youngsters discuss methods and attempts at suicide – which are now to be part of a government review of safety on the web – to be met with comments like: “You want to be dead but ur just scared of the process that gets u there. It’s normal.”
Even the general social networking sites like Bebo – which millions of British teenagers use – can play a part.
Three of the Bridgend suicides – Zachary Barnes, Liam Clarke and Natasha Randall – all shared friends on Bebo. Randall posted a message to Liam following his death whose almost jokey tone reflects the slight unreality that often attaches to online behaviour: “RIP Clarky boy!! gonna miss ya! allways remember the good times! love ya x”. Randall’s site – perhaps typical of many teenagers’ – featured sex quizzes and pictures of herself in revealing outfits.
Online “memorials”, eerily reminiscent of the flowers and cards left at roadside accident sites by friends and strangers alike, are now commonplace. Randall’s suicide attracted hundreds of comments before her profile was taken down on Wednesday, most of which made reference to her looks and praised her. Even the negative comments alluded to the attention she was receiving after her death. “Chrissie” wrote: “R.I.P Like. . . But why?. . . Isit Tru She Wanted More Bebo Views? Hope Your Lookin Down On Your Family & Friends. They Must Be In Peices Because Of Youu. . . No Need Too Do Some-thin Soo Selfish.”
It’s too simple to blame the internet for a phenomenon that, according to Loren Coleman, author of the book Suicide Clusters, has ebbed and flowed throughout the centuries and is often linked to complex social factors. In the depression of the 1930s, he points out, Americans blamed comic books for suicides plainly linked to economic deprivation. Today, says Coleman, “it’s not video games, it’s not the media, it’s not television. It’s part of the human condition”.
It’s nothing new, he claims: “Sigmund Freud held a conference on youth suicide clusters in the 1920s.” When Coleman published his book in 1987, nobody believed they were a phenomenon. Now, he says, it’s a no-brainer. “The particulars are a small geographical area, similar ages and backgrounds and similar method. All these kids died by hanging. That’s a method that takes some thought and it’s very painful. It’s almost certainly because they heard about it and chose it in a deliberate fashion.
“People find it easier to accept the idea in families, like the Hemingway family, where five people chose suicide. Well, these youths are like an extended family. If you’re vulnerable and desperate, you’re easily affected by models. You think: if they figured suicide was their option, maybe I should.”
It is an unpalatable but undeniable fact that death attracts attention. “Reality TV means young people are constantly bombarded with instant fame and instant success. A young person in a deprived area sees this and it’s psychologically destructive. They think: if I’m a nobody butI commit suicide, I’ll be a somebody. I’ll get my photo in the papers, I’ll have a memorial on the internet. How can I be a celebrity? Well, if I don’t get onto Big Brother, an alternative is death. My friends are doing it.”
Dr Arthur Cassidy, the social psychologist, set up a mobile suicide prevention unit in Co Armagh after a suicide cluster in the area claimed three boys in the space of a month last summer. He takes his converted caravan to where young people gather and he and his team make themselves available to the alienated young people who feel trapped with no future beyond their immediate grim surroundings.
“They don’t see Samaritans posters or they feel that that’s for adults,” he explains. “So we go to them. When their minds are in that sort of turmoil they need to talk about it in confidence. We try to break down the negative thought patterns in which death is an option and replace them with a learned optimism.”
Teenagers are trying out different identities, looking for role models, he adds. So they are easily influenced by self-harm-ing celebrities in the tabloid newspapers and stories of suicide: “The media can romanti-cise death. There are music and films which glorify suicide. A heavy-metaller who writes suicidal lyrics can appeal to them; their own negative self-concept is consistent with what they read about these musicians who have negative life experiences, are addicted to drugs and so on.”
There used to be five youth focus groups in Bridgend, where teenagers could turn for counselling, but funding was withdrawn and now there is only one. “Bridgend has poverty, unemployment, it’s an old mining town . . . the osmosis of depression, the groundlessness, has leaked through to the youth. What is there for young people if they stay in that community? What sense of hope has been lost?” says Coleman.
“People forget that suicide is about pain. It’s about escaping from pain, not ending your life. So the only way we can help young people is to talk to them about that pain. And it’s up to us to say that yes, there are some bad parts of life that we all go through, but life is really pretty wonderful.” Additional reporting: Nic North and Roger Waite
If you are concerned for a young person you know, call Papyrus’s helpline on 0870 170 4000
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The problem is not drugs, or religions or websites. The problem is the society we live in. It is full of cruel heartless people who have no conscience. Suicide is not caused by one thing. It happens when a person finally snaps under the pressure of a lot of things. Mostly the real problem is at home
neville, Calcutta, India
alchohol and drugs are in any town but they are not the cause of the worlds evil. I'm 17 i used to self harm and it wasnt due to drugs, drink or the net. and it wasnt prayer or god that saved my 'immortal soul', it was the love of my mum and friends. religion causes more problems than it solves.
Eli, llandudno,
Its ignorance like Toms comments about Islam healing hearts that fails to address the deep underlying issues as to why this is really happening. These are desperate times and things may probably get much worse before people can wake up to the real need and urgency for our youth to be taught about morals, purpose, values, self worth etc. instead of being brain washed and contaminated by the limited rubbish they are being exposed to through media, magazines (looks, sex, size 0's etc.), t.v. (eastenders etc. ) internet. Their minds being fed and contaminated with so much negativity and/or totally worthless, meaningless drivel that doesn't contribute to their 'spiritual' growth. How many people actually believe in the importance of feeding the inner self, the spiritual side of ourselves instead of the flesh which leads to emptiness as one of the youths mentioned when he said something along the lines of "sex, drugs, we have done it all". This is what they are being taught matters...
Janet Theodoulou, Haringey, London
In response to the comment made by Laim from London earlier about the cause being drugs etc.
If you had ever travelled to bridgend or the surrounding areas you would understand for such a small community really the now 17 suicides cannot all be because of drugs, and because they are all in need of jesus, Bridgend is a rather small place and drugs is a problem like in most areas but not on a massive scale....there cannot be one simple answer to why these teenagers have commited suicide. We may never know why they did, or whether they did the right thing. But its happened and families just want to know why, and a reason like drugs would really make them feel better wouldnt it!?
Cairn, Swansea,
I'm a young person and i think that it all links up. Bridgend isn't that big, people know each other, each death links to another eventually because people are linked to one another through friends, family and the internet. People suffer for others deaths and reach a point where they themselves can't cope,. people sometimes feel forced into making decisions quickly, sometimes without thought just because others are doing it. People these days follow there friends, or websites like bebo like a cult, a trend which they will do anything and everything just to be like other people, or too take away the suffering.
Parents should be more in touch with there children and talk with them about these subjects, the youth should be informed and educated on these things, and the people in the community should look out for each other. If this truely is down to drugs and alchohol, why isn't anybody doing anything to stop it? Isn't that what parents, schools and communities are supposed to do?
Sarah, West Sussex,
I sympathise with you, Jim. I know for sure that prayer is the key to turning around what we have damaged by removing God, respect for authority and discipline from our children.
Jean, London,
Being a neuropharmacologist, I propose the suicides being in a small area and seemingly unrelated due to a possible common factor: drugs.
There are two ways that they could be effected to commit suicide by drugs:
1) Serotonergic and Domaminergic pathways in their brains damaged from common recreational drugs like ecstasy and cocaine lead to lack of lustre in life and increase in suicide.
2) Accidental administration of endocannabinoid antagonists sold as a new drug on the streets, where the side effects are if they already are predisposed to depression, it's a pretty much little resistance choice that suicide is a good idea
And one theological point:
1) They are in need of a saviour: Jesus Christ
Liam, London, England
My daughters school discovered my daughters first time of self harming and notified me. We have sat down and had a chat on many occassions to get to the source of the problem. I take her to the psychologist where she talks issues with them. I do not get to know what is spoken about? My daughter has self harmed recently again. I am very close to my daughter and we do talk on issues, but i can see there is still something there that she cannot explain. she states that she hears voices telling her to do this. I know most of the problems stem from being unable to understanding that there is not much money coming into the house as i am unemployed, and not able to get permanent employment. the other problems are caused at school through through bullying and discrimination against her and us as a family. No respect for the teachers at the school as they do very little even if they witness what is happening. Just gloss over things. Oh i could go on and on. So i am not sure what to do next ?
Jim, Cardiff, Wales
i feel that this article is portraying teenagers in a very negative and unkind way, we do not all make rash decisions and some of us are intelligent enough to realise that death is final.
We also realise that there is more to life than sites like bebo and myspaace.
Natasha, London,
Definitely any such site which is encouraging death should be strictly bannned. Children are very sensitive and impulsive too. They want to seek stimulation and when they get bored in their lives they might take such drastic steps. What I feel that the parents should try to find out what exactly is going in their child's lives. If they find anything abnormal they should immeditely seek professional help say psychologist or the psychaitrist etc. They should explore about their child's lives and take any such thoughts very seriously.
Smita Pandey Bhat, Gurgaon, India
christianity and secularism failed to offer them hope..
islam will heal their broken hearts
tom, cressington,
This article does talk sense, & the availability of information to vunerable young people on "How to commit suicide" on the WWW is extremely dangerous.
My own Daughter Stella took her own life at 17 years following a complicated time where she was unable to find help for her problems.
For some of this time she was in a Adolescent Psychiatric unit in S.E.London. Following her death & during the subsequent investigation, we were absolutely horrified as parents to find out that she was able to access suicide "help" web-sites from within the Hospital whilst an in-patient!
Youth is by it's very nature impulsive, reckless & random.
Without a doubt young people do not seem to understand that death is final & the end. Any website that encourages death is morally irresponsible, as they can influence the minds of unhappy people without offering them support or a different outcome to their problems.
Suicide remains a poorly thought out remedy for the young - a final solution to problems
Maggie Candy, Bexleyheath, Kent/England