OH HOW we do like to snigger at those Fifties homemakers who promised to love, honour and obey. The image of the serene domestic goddess was no doubt put forward by some pig of a man who wanted his wife chained to the kitchen sink and promised (somewhere in the marriage vows) that a life baking cupcakes and changing endless nappies was the route to eternal salvation.

The stereotype remains quaint but not something that the emancipated career woman is supposed to desire. But what working mother juggling deadlines every day hasn’t secretly harboured a stay-at-home life that purportedly promises more leisure time? That romanticised ideal has in recent years turned into a genuine aspiration for a kind of gingham wholesomeness.

On a fashion level, Desperate Housewives may not be bold and daring but it’s an interesting look at the language of clothes: how they help to create an impression and similarly what they manage, emotionally speaking, to conceal.

All four characters dress fashionably rather than being trail-blazers, but they all retain a distinct idiosyncratic style to reflect their characters.

Bree (aka Mayoress of Stepford)

As repressed as her hip-hugging pencil skirts, her fanatical devotion to housework and cordon bleu cuisine is rivalled only by her dedication to looking groomed to within an inch of her life. And all that achieved on a thrifty budget!

First there’s the shoulder-length hair that never moves, then, despite having two teenage children, there’s that whippet-thin figure to maintain. This is the character that most plays up to the Fifties ideal, opting for the twin set and pearls combo and shift dresses with prettifying details (those at Paule Ka and Tara Jarmon are the best examples). But despite that slick, pulled-together look, here is an unhappy woman — the matching shoes and bags serve to add a layer of gloss to her dull and empty days.

Meticulous when it comes to detail, her appearance is something she can control, and when it comes to relying on an errant husband or a beautiful but practical handbag, the Anya Hindmarch wins hands down every time.

Susan (aka the Ditsy Divorcée)

Prone to scattiness, the vulnerable Susan takes a very laissez-faire attitude when it comes to dressing her ectomorph frame. Hers is the laid-back approach. She chooses high street over a designer label (in part because her divorce settlement isn’t generous enough), mixing skinny Seven jeans with kaftan top or T-shirt. At night she isn’t averse to something pretty, girly and fun, especially if she’s on a date with the sexy plumber Mike Delfino.

Lynette (aka Wannabe Super Mum)

More comfortable in her role as CEO than stay-at-home mum, Lynette struggles to strike the balance between finding intellectual stimulation and looking after four children under the age of 8. She has hung up those corporate suits and her daywear now consists of no-nonsense shirts and trousers — Margaret Howell would be the designer of choice.

On the rare occasion that she goes out in the evening she digs out those relics from the days of expense-account dinners. After all, a little left-over Calvin Klein or David Szeto always comes in handy.

Gabrielle (aka Bored Trophy Wife)

Nothing is too good (or too expensive) for this dipped-in-honey, lithe vixen who favours Pucci halternecks with a lot of plunge. But don’t be fooled. She may appear to be a bimbo but this woman knows exactly what she wants and how to get it. This nous comes in handy for seducing the young gardener or spending even more of her financier husband’s money. She can’t resist a bold floral print — the louder the better (head to Tata Naka) — and for evening sparkle there’s always a Carlos Miele shimmer gown. Girly at heart, she might also wear Sara Berman shorts with a strappy corset. You’ll never find Gabby in a pair of flats — Jimmy Choo mules are the benchmark. It’s a carefully planned predatory ensemble that is well executed and in some ways just as contrived as Bree’s.

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