The cost of marriage puts it beyond the reach of many young people, yet it is the aspiration of an overwhelming majority, according to a survey.

An Ipsos MORI poll of people aged between 20 and 35, done for the right-of-centre Civitas think-tank found that seven in ten wanted to marry. Of those cohabiting, eight out of ten wanted to wed. The most frequently found reason for wanting to marry was to indicate commitment, another large proportion saying that the institution provided a stable environment to bring up children.

The main reason for not having yet married was having not met the right person, but almost a quarter of those surveyed said it was financial: either they could not afford the wedding or were waiting for things to improve, for instance so that they could buy a home. Among cohabiting couples, the number of people giving financial reasons for not having married rose from 24 per cent to 30 per cent. In 2006 the marriage rate was 22.8 per cent, the lowest since records began in 1862.

Anastasia de Waal, author of the report, said: “In the past, people had to marry – but today, people want to. The last Census and the Millennium Cohort Study reveal that marriage is out of reach for many.”

The Millennium Cohort Study, a national survey of children born in 2000, found that at the time of the children’s birth, 55 per cent of the single parents and 43 per cent of those cohabiting lived in disadvantaged areas – compared with 26 per cent of married parents. By contrast, 68 per cent of the married parents lived in relatively affluent areas compared with 35 per cent of the single parents and 56 per cent of the cohabiting parents.

Ms de Waal criticised the approach of both main political parties. The Conservatives have promised tax breaks to “incentivise” marriage. “But most people already want to marry,” she said. “Research shows that more employment, not tax breaks, will enable them to. Pressurising people to marry will not stabilise the family in the absence of the circumstances conducive to commitment. Marriage signals, rather than generates, commitment,” she said.

Labour had wrongly equated marriage and cohabitation, the report said. “What are construed [by Labour] as positive manifestations of diversity are in fact very often negative manifestations of deprivation and limiting circumstances,” Ms de Waal said.

Civitas argues that family policy should be based on equal parental responsibility. “Family policy must include men, starting from childcare to the position that even if the relationship between adults ends, the responsibilities towards children don’t. Child poverty is strongly connected to the failure of nonresident parents to contribute financially,” the report says.

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