I am 12 years younger than my balding, plump, bespectacled soon to be fifty partner. When I met him 5 years ago he certainly wasn't like this..Do I feel cheated?? Not at all... I wouldn't change him for all the money in the world!

Phillipa, Devon, UK

I'm single, 38, happy, solvent, and have my say on my life and my self determination. So much love to all of you, married or not. 'Nuff said.

John, Tallinn, Estonia

You need to experience married life to know what it feels like. The laughter of my son is the sweetest music to my ears. Did I hear somebody say; being married is for lazy people? The challenges of bringing up a child is gratifying when you remain in love with the mother of your child.

dennis , Durban, South Africa

I find this topic fascinating! In Canada, 75% of divorce is initiated by women...and 1 out of 2 marriages end in divorce. I believe that women marry because they want to have children. period. I think this may be true for some men, but most are probably looking to replace their mothers!

Tanya, Halifax, Canada

My pretty 25yr old female friends and I take one look at the sad 36+ year old men chatting us up and see a free meal ticket. Thats all. As pathetically selfish individuals, they lack potential for anything more meaningful than a glass of wine and we know that. Its just economics.

Helen, London,

A married father of 2, I can tell you I dream about guyland daily. But it's not all bad. Kids or not is the question. If yes is the answer for u, then your youth n beauty become a blank check you get to use only once(or twice,3maybe). Spend that check wisely. Decide too late and you get the mirror.

Tom, eltingville, usa

goodness me so many people have such a dim view of marriage! You can get married and still enjoy life (with or without children) as long as you remain your own person with plenty of interests and passions. A relationship can enrich your life, it does not have to be just a way to escape loneliness.

Fede, London,

I'm in support of Sam and Anna's comments, but then again I'm presently 32 and happy and single in girlland. The only thing that I would miss out on being older is missing out on having children.

Jill, London,

Anna - don't be so sure that everyone is as child-centric as you are. I'm single at 38 and pretty much certain to remain so as I have never been interested in the reproduction racket. Most 35+ women in my neck of the woods have two or three kids by two or three different men. Count me out of that.

Dave , Leeds, UK

The point is that singles don't have children and this is very likely to become a problem later in their lives. They won't miss being married, they will miss having children.
A 40 year old guy without children is almost as sad as a 40 year old women without children. How come nobody admits this?

anna, Podgorica, Montenegro

There will always be losers who can't control their lives, these guys need to be married so "mommie" can take care of them. How pathetic, for the rest of us who have fantastic single lives (and probably higher IQ's) its fantastic. Most women out there have ruined their lifes . I Don't NEED It

Rick, Clinton, USA

This article is just plain dense - for one, why would being in a relationship necessitate getting rid of an Xbox or a DVD collection? Secondly, the article referred to featured a quote from a confirmed batchelor who called women "chicks". At age 45. George Clooney he clearly ain't.

Kate Cleary, London, UK

I think, Victoria that it is all to do with lack of humour and nasty divorce settlements. Men are frightened. When my husband & I split up in 1977 he said he'd keep the car & I could have our child, which was fine by me & no lawyers seemed remotely interested. It appears times have changed. Sad.

sarah, France, France

As a single 35 year old man, i espoused these principles until i suffered from depression and alcohol dependency and lost my job. Guys, you can only live the shallow life for so long. I am still anti-marriage, but trying to wean myself off booze and casual sex/whores. Understand the risks of single.

Jim, Clifton, USA

Somebody please enlighten me re: why so many men hate women so much. We too could come up with nasty generalisations like,"Why should I get married when there is a damn good chance that I will end up beaten or mentally bullied" but we dont. Men have done FAR more harm to women but I don't hate men.

Victoria, Toronto, Canada

Man or woman, you should never have to talk yourself into marrying. If the desire for marriage/children isn't there and you're enjoying your single life, go for it. I'm a married woman, but I don't resent someone who decides that lifestyle isn't for them. We don't need reluctant parents!

Laura, Atlanta, Georgia

Being an unmarried 30 yr old man, i see very little in marriage which makes me want to sign on to it. I think i am a lot happier being in a relationship than can ever imagine myself being married. Of course, i will like kids at a point in time but that's hardly a reason to get married. GC is my HERO

TK, london,

Ha! You're all wrong! Over 50, very fit, never married, millionaire, yacht, lovely house, a number of good, wholesome long relationships with fabulous girls but no kids (does the world really need more??) I live in a different 'guyland' to the narrow, sad cliche described here!

Mark, London, UK

The happiest and most productive people I have known -- both male and female -- are those who receive their educations, become accomplished professionally in fields that have social worth, travel the world, have wonderful friendships, and don't live fear-based lives. These same folks are single.

Pat Fitzgerald, New York, USA

Some fair points wrapped up in the usual sterotyping men-are-this-women-are-that nonsense. Some *people* suit settling down, others suit freedom.

Jack, I think you may mean 'misandric' rather than 'androgynistic' - would that we had a press that wasn't obsessed with sex differences!

Lyn, Birmingham, UK

I find it fasinating that single males view us females as the enemy except for sex and occasionally companionship when it suits them. I agree that there are times when a family can be confining and perhaps seem like the old ball and chain. Women are gatherers, men are hunters. Common knowledge.

Sharon Hollar, Statesville, usa

Guys: when you make sweeping generalisations about women, you are giving women the justification to make generalisations about us. We all know damn well that not ALL women are nasty so grow up, stop whinging and get over yourselves. Yes, some are princesses, but many are good, fair, amazing people.

Ron, Exeter, UK

Guess I am a female version of a "city adventurer." 32 and a bachelorette-I'd love to have a good relationship, but am too busy to stop for one. Singing, socializing, reading, the outdoors-I enjoy it all. If you're independent and love life, you owe it to yourself to make the most of it-boy or girl.

Shelley, Boston, USA

.....marriage is union and cordial affection between the two parties. ...... exercise the utmost care and become acquainted with each other's character. This eternal bond should be made secure by a firm covenant, and the intention should be to foster harmony, fellowship and unity.....

Petron, Kunming, China

This whole idea of marriage or need to be involved in some form of partnership never fails to mystify me - writing as a gay man I can say that marriage was never going to feature on my agenda and thankfully so! - I think that more marriages would work if each partner lived in separate spaces.

phil smith, lincoln, uk

It's okay when you are young and single but what happens to these old duffers,say over 55?They then become sad. I met my husband when he was 50 and I was 40.It was the right time for us.We would both have been too selfish before that time to share our lives.Work always came first, until we met.

Jan, London, England

"..the best-looking girls in his year decided they didn’t fancy their spotty-faced contemporaries and began dating the sixth-former with a Vauxhall Astra. It’s not revenge, exactly, but they started it."
Pure gold - keep it up Joseph.

Shane, London,

"Ive got a lovely Thai girlfriend who can cook, clean & doesnt nag. - adrian, surrey"

"... great cook and does not nag me to get married. - Richard, Singapore"

Oh dear, sounds more like servants you have sex with. I wonder how long before they drop a nasty, well deserved, surprise on you!

Alice, York,

The British obsession with having relationships and getting married drive me nuts. Not having a relationship or not being married does not make you a leper, for goodness sake! Why do people have to make such a fuss about it?

Ross, lancaster, UK

Im only 25 but I can see how some of my friends are going to fall into the traps others describe here. I describe it as a fear, there is a definite fear of being alone and feeling unfufilled due to not being in a relationship..I pity these people and they pity me so I guess its each to their own!

steve morgan, Hastings,

Since we know nothing about Clooney's sexuality, how do we actually know if he is in a committed relationship or not? As with Lord Brown, the media often likes to keep secrets (open secrets in some circles) to itself...

Ben, London, England

Even Warren Beatty got tired of "guyland" and settled down. Whatever works for an individual is fine, life is short, but there is a certain comfort growing older with the right person.

Hilda, Casper, USA

It just doesn't end at 39.
I am 50 something and have found the Bachelor life more than fulfilling.
Yes, I have been married a couple of times but this is much better. It was pleasant I grant you but in retrospect, families talk men into marriage, like brainwashing.
I now spend my time for me.

Howard Leech, Gdansk, Poland

wow! great article/subject. I`m 38 now, i`d like to meet `the one`, i really would, but where is she? I`ll find her, i`m sure, maybe soon. Not so sure about kids though, 160% effort required, disfunctional friends and family take a lot of that energy! Gotta keep moving..

Gary, London,

I think women have brought all this about themselves.

You only have to pick up a newspaper or talk to a friend to realise men have been robbed in broad daylight when they get a divorce through the courts!!!

Why would you want to pay maintainance for the rest of your useful life to an ex wife !

slade wallis, Retford, Great Britain

People used to ask me why I'd never married. I'd say "just lucky, I guess!" Then I bumped into a girl I'd had a brief fling with 15 years earlier. It was the right person at the right time and I haven't regretted anything, before or since.

JJ Flash, Birmingham,

Like Emma from London, not sure this is just a bloke thing. I wouldn't mind a spinster pad, the odd holiday romance, and a fulfilling set of interests and friends. Sounds perfect.

Deborah, Kyoto,

So TRUE! So TRUE! Cracking article Joseph.

John C, Birmingham, West Midlands

The main reason for marriage is to have a family and women want it more because of the biological urge to nurture children. If only men had the courage to remain single, women would have to face the truth that they need marriage a damn site more than men. Men do it out of duty, women out of necessit

chris, orleans, france

Every culture in the world expects adults to partner and have a family--polygamous or otherwise, unless they're in a monastery.
No culture approves of an eternal playtime--not that I don't look longingly at it a lot of times.

Dave, New Mexico, USA

Marriage does not necessarily equate to incarceration. If you have any substance when you enter marriage you can still be the master of your destiny & not a pulverised wimp. Life after marriage evolves with children, its not easy but the easy route in life offers no rewards.

Matt, Bournemouth, UK

George was married for 4 years and divorced. That's not a confirmed bachelor. Just sayin'.

Ann, Coleraine,

What makes you all so sure we want to marry you, anyway?

Jodie, Melbourne, Australia

So sad that men hate women so much. It just makes me so sad.

Lynne, melbourne, australia

It shocks me to read that male commenters here think of women go in a relationship and divorce men just to get their checkbooks. When I divorced, I left everything , even didn't contest pension and started all over again.

monica, berlin, germany

I dont see why this is a guy thing. As a 31 year old girl, I'd say the same (well, not re squash and ex boxes but same basic principle)

Emma, London, UK

Im 47, still single, Ive got my own house, sports car, good job, Ive never been interested in being married. All my friends who married are now divorced, lost their houses etc. Why bother getting married? Ive got a lovely Thai girlfriend who can cook, clean & doesnt nag, English ladies take note.

adrian gunn, farnham, surrey

I wouldn't swop Clooney's wealth,looks and lifestyle for one smile from my daughter, lights up my day. Marriage is about family life, if you lack the maturity to give up your time for others I guess it isn't for you.

john, tokyo,

Sure, bachelors die early. That's often due to the fact that they don't have a wife to call 911 when they are stricken by a stroke, heart attack, etc. Frankly, I'd rather die alone, than in the arms of someone who has bored me or aggrivated me for years.

Jim, Loveland, OH, U.S.

in other places and historical times , to get married gave a man certain rights and was thus attractive. Today , there seems to be no legal upside ( for a man ) and a huge hazard if the relationship turns sour.
No wonder so many men are reluctant to sign on the dotted line.

frank, swindon, uk

Being unmarried doesn't mean being single. You can have all the benefits of a relationship without marriage, and without the rising likelihood and worsening penalties of divorce. I've yet to hear one advantage of marriage that doesn't apply to all romantic relationships. So why risk divorce, guys?

Malcolm, London, UK

I am a sexy, beautiful, fit, intelligent, funny, independent, successful, caring, loving, brave, motorbiking woman. Sure, you can shag as many vacant 20-something Paris Hilton look-a-likes as you can shake your stick at. Personally, I wouldn't touch you with a barge pole.

Jayne, Glasgow,

"Who are your friends that you should seek them with hours to kill? Rather seek them with hours to live." thank you, Khalil Gibran. The same can be said of a life partner.
No I've been there. I've seen my friends there. Life- and people!- is to be enjoyed, not gotten through.

Ronda, Acheres, France

I advise any man to marry a woman who makes at least as much money as he. That way, in case of divorce, there is probably no alimony. In case she makes much more, then there may even be no child support for the man to pay. Or better yet, she may have to pay him.

Jon Maynard, Lansing MI, USA

current family laws make marriage just one big trap for men, if a wife gets tired of you, she can have you thrown out of the house that you paid for, steals kids, car. And the man must pay slavery child support to poor cupcake. Women are all mad entitlement princesses, best to stay clear long term

martin swash, Middlesbrough,

I would like to marry someone who is truly desirable with an open-genuine heart, cute face with similar interests, but I am not going to force it. Difficult where I live with the "privileged princesses" type in abundance, last girl I dated stopped seeing me because I evoked true emotions in her. : /

Michael, New Orleans, USA

A married man is a tenant in his wife's house. It's her territory. And as a woman she claims moral rectitude in everything. A single man is master of his own house and is only nagged by next door's hungry cat.

david, bangor, wales

Nice girls don't call men emotional retards.

Darren, London, England

Lack of money, rationed sex - it's all true, but I wouldn't swap it for the single life. Take a couple of days snowboarding with your son, or sailing with your daughter. 1000 times more fulfilling than doing it with other adults, and by their teens more challenging too.

Riccardo, Solihull,

Thanks for this feel-good article which is a breath of fresh air in the androgynistic press we have today

Jack, London, UK

Mens ego always assumes that women are desperate to run down the aisle. We`re not! Actually when looking at friends relationships it seems that women spend their lives compromising whilst men think they do, but don`t. Why would I want that life?

meme, Leeds, UK

Grass is always greener is really all this article says. There are obvious benefits to being either single or married for either sex.

One thing though, and here's a warning guys... Nice girls don't like guys who've been around too much; it smacks of STDs and emotional retardation. Yuck.

anita, cambridge, uk

Good article, but I promise you, you don't know what you are missing out on by not having your own kids. They really make you see what's important in life and however much you are enjoying surf boarding or drinking all night or whatever your single life income permits I know what I would choose.

Dave, Bedlington, UK

I got bored of hanging around in bars and got married at 35. 18-35 is a long time to be in guyland doing the barfly bit a few times a week. I eventaully tired of multiple partners as it is shallow and not fufilling. Ok in your 20-30's but 40's! Most guys I know in their 40's are fat and balding.

maxdee, prague, czech

oh I agree, I'm 34, bleary eyed after arriving here at 7am following a night out starting in Richmond, - restaurant, then a pub, salsa dancing club place in Leicester Square, 3am chinese in china town, another club, bacon and egg sandwiches and coffee at 7, next brunch and bloody marys at 11! smile

Ted, London, England

I suppose living with the the woman one loves is happiness and having legitimate children with her too, both require marriage

peter c, Devizes, Wessex

Whilst I think it takes 2 to make and to break a marriage,I do agree.I know so many unhappy, trapped, people in marriages. Whilst most unattached ,male mainly ,are really living quality lives.There is a lot to said for being On your own .
Society forces us to think we "have" for have "someone"

D McGregor, St Mawes, UK

George Clooney is hardly your average man: he's rich, famous, charming, funny and handsome. He can get any woman out there, so why indeed should he marry? Most other men in the world, however, are not as fortunate, so they should hang on to whatever decent woman they can find who will tolerate them.

Dana, Boston, USA

Can you imagine the number of seething women, using all their desperate tactics, trying anything to get a hold of your cheque book! Great article!

John Tomlinson, Brentwood, Essex

In our shalow times, marriage is viewed as a set of socially imposed rules rather than a spiritual two-souls-becoming-one. However, being happily divorced twice, I still cannot find an acceptable alternative. Falling in love can give you a drug like high. But you long for a meaningful relationship.

Doris, London,

I personally have found out that the folks who get upset about the existence of bachelors (or "bachelorettes") are mainly those of the opposite sex who are eager for finding a spouse or those who have become disillusioned with their own marriage. Long live the libertines.

Asta, Hamburg, Germany

Don't think this is exclusive to single men. Many single women are in the same boat finding they are much happier living the single life with a few dalliances .
Society is different today and people do not feel that they have to conform to or be forced into couples for the sake of
appearances!

Anne Hoover, Toronto, Canada

My own case, divorced with two kids who stay with me one weekend and then the other weekend is free, has advantages that should be mentioned more often. If you take a positive outlook its a situation that encompasses many of the advantages discussed above with the added joy of being a dad.

Tom, Glasgow,

Every day I see women berating their menfolk in public. Delays on the tube - it's the man's fault. These men cannot be happy. Then one day, the woman, a size 18 by then, will decide that he cannot meet her emotional needs - whatever that means - and will divorce him, happy to take his assets

Pete, London,

It's no different for women ! I have had five marriage proposals and each time look at my girlfriends in unhappy relationships and decide that single is best. The happiest I have been is when I didn't live with a boyfriend. We both have very independent lives and that's what makes it work,

Gill, London , uk

Personally, i totally agree, guyland is the place to be. Marriage is for the lazy types, who like to "hang around". Not only that, its also outdated. Tying yourelf down when there is a vast world out there, is mind boggling to me.

nipho, newport,

As a woman, I couldn't agree with you more. I have always believed that only unoriginal and unimaginative men (sorry) want to settle early.

Anna, Belgrade,

Oh come on when a man turns 50 he better give up that Clooney attitude about women. The body isn't what it use to be and most hot young women aren't looking for an antique. Lasting relationships are for the rare few that are lucky enough to have them. Let's see who is cooing over Clooney at age 70.

julie, Austin, Travis

agood article
guyland is not for everyone, gay or straight, but hey it is right for alot of people, and we have to be relaxed with their choice...Yes you judgemental pointy finger married types ...chill out....if you are not happy with your own choice change it...dont slag others off

Matt, london,

I mainly agree, but the fact is when you're older you run out of friends to hang out with. Finding a 'life-partner' becomes about the avoidance of loneliness.

Richard, London,