At a recent coffee morning at the fashionable Brilliant Kids café in North
London, the maternity sex expert Rachel Foux passed around a couple of sex
toys to the assembled young mothers. “Everyone was ooohing and aaahing and
handing them around. We're not talking about mega dildos here. These toys
are beautiful to look at and, since they're not phallic-shaped, none of the
women could believe what they were,” she says.
The days of rubbery vibrators brought out with sniggers at hen nights are
defiantly over. Kick-started by the phenomenal sales of the Rampant Rabbit,
which shot to fame after featuring in Sex and the City, sex toys are out and
proud. Now they come with a designer pedigree too and are just as likely to
be given as gifts between girlfriends, couples and even as wedding presents
- the new scented candle, if you like.
Here's Jamil Moen from Kiki de Montparnasse, the upmarket American erotic
emporium where Lindsay Lohan had a birthday party, waxing lyrical about ...
a vibrator: “It's beautiful, egg-shaped, lustrous and modern. The perfect
balance of an organic shape with a graphic cheeky print.” The price? A hefty
$135 (£95).
The Motif Vibe is just one of a new generation of expensive sex toys aimed at
style-conscious women and men. “They're small, they're classy, they feel
nice - and they don't look out of place alongside an iPhone in a Burberry
handbag,” Foux says. And, despite the recession, women and men are buying
them in droves.
At Sh!, London's first sex shop for women, sales are up 35 per cent from last
year, with luxury toys growing from 10 per cent of all sales in 2007 to 30
per cent last year. At Lelo, a Swedish firm, sales are up 200 per cent
year-on-year. Sales of sex toys at Myla, the luxury British firm, increased
10 per cent this year and 30 per cent the year before and, at the American
company Jimmyjane, famous for selling Kate Moss a $325 (£226) gold-plated
vibrator, sales boomed by 35 per cent. These companies have spotted a gap in
the market for female-friendly, luxury sex toys and lingerie, and television
shows such as Sex and the City, Secret Diary of a Call Girl, Gossip Girl and
Lipstick Jungle have empowered women to buy them.
Daniel Gestetner, the chief executive of Myla, recalls a dinner party last
weekend. “When I told one woman what I did she immediately told me she had
bought one of our sex toys and loved it. It's amazing. I had never met her
before and within five minutes she's telling me that she has bought a sex
toy!”
There are even environmentally-friendly sex toys, with Livia Giuggioli, of the
chic Eco store in London, selling feather tickle-sticks and wooden spanking
rulers made by Coco de Mer, the upmarket sex shop.
Katherine Hoyle, the managing director of Sh!, recalls how things have changed
since she opened her shop in London in 1992. “At that time vibrators were
flesh-coloured and phallic, bought in seedy sex shops by men for women. But
now women are buying for themselves.” These women believe thatorgasms are
their right , and if that means spending money on something that fits into
their lifestyle, so be it. Rachel Morris, a psychotherapist and sex
columnist for Cosmopolitan, says: “Sex toys are one area where I want
something well made and comfortable, as well as good looking. It's like
having nice underwear; if you can produce something gorgeous and not tacky,
it's a much nicer thing to bring out and use with a partner.”
The key word here is partner. Many women buy luxury sex toys to use
themselves, but there is also a growing demand among couples to buy erotic
gifts for each other to zing up their sex lives. Bettina Arndt, a sex
therapist and writer, asked couples to keep notes about their sex lives for
a year while she was researching her new book, The Sex Diaries. She
discovered that vibrators no longer threatened men; that they have come to
see them as helpful. “Men realise that vibrators can be a little ally in
what can be the rather difficult process of arousing a woman. ”
Ethan Imboden, the founder of Jimmyjane, has also seen a big increase in
couples buying for each other. “It's about the melting of the ice around
sexuality.” He gets regular e-mails from men and women asking for advice on
what to buy for their partner. With an impressive roster of clients,
including Teri Hatcher, Dita Von Teese and Jessica Alba, he finds many are
drawn to the most expensive products. “People will contact us for wedding
gifts and buy our little platinum vibrator with diamonds ($3,250) for the
bride, and seven of the little gold-plated vibrators ($325) for the
bridesmaids.”
Although Jimmyjane sells at upmarket stores such as Browns in London, it also
sells many sex toys online because some women still find going into a shop
embarrassing. Emily, 37, a film producer, prefers to buy online. “I know I
shouldn't be embarrassed, but I can't help it, I just feel shifty handing
over my credit card to buy a sex toy.”
Sam Roddick, the owner of Coco de Mer, says that customers can spend two hours
browsing. “You don't shop for sex like you shop for other things. People are
vulnerable, so we have created a sanctuary. It's not like you are buying a
throwaway item from a supermarket.”
At the pricier end of the spectrum you wonder whether women aren't being
seduced by clever marketing. First, they are told that their lives aren't
complete without the designer handbag, then the 4in designer heels, and now
they have been told that they have to spend hundreds on a designer sex toy
as well? “That sex toys have become part of fashion is a slightly worrying
trend for me,” says Katherine Hoyle of Sh!. “People can be quite vulnerable
when it comes to their sexuality and really believe that something they buy
will change their life.”
Suzi Godson, Weekend's sex columnist, believes that the advantages of sex toys
- to single women and couples - are worth the outlay if they can afford it.
“The market used to be dominated by 12in, flesh-pink, realistically veined
dildos that embarrassed women and intimidated men. The success of the Rabbit
alerted manufacturers to the blindingly obvious: sex toys would be vastly
improved if form followed function, rather than the other way around.”
She says that while cheaper sex toys work just as well, in a mature commercial
market people will pay for aesthetics. “For a woman who can afford it, a
choice between a pink plastic ‘adult novelty' that has been made from a
cocktail of toxins in a Chinese factory and a hand-tooled 24-carat gold
limited-edition Jimmyjane is a no-brainer.
She says that vibrators definitely help women to achieve orgasm more easily -
60 per cent of women use them regularly. And size, it seems, really doesn't
matter. “Men are much more accepting of luxury sex toys because they tend to
be less threatening. The gold Jimmyjane is slimline and only 5.25in long!”
You sexy things
Jimmyjane,Little gold vibrator, $325 (£226)
Made famous by Kate Moss. It is known as the iPod of vibrators. Available in
platinum and steel and with diamonds for $3,250 .
www.jimmyjane.com
Myla, The Bone, £199.
This iconic product was designed by Tom Dixon, better known for his furniture
design.
www.myla.com
Sh! Lelo Liv, £56.99
From a Swedish firm, it is considered to be environmentally friendly as it is
rechargeable .
www.sh-womenstore.com
Coco de Mer, Feather tickler, £45
The company specialises in expensive games for couples. It sells a range of
range of feather ticklers. The latest,
designed by Paul Seville, is already a bestseller.
www.coco-de-mer.com
