Things you only know if you’re single…that there is an economics of dating.

A lone ranger of the feminine persuasion writes: “Dear TYOKIYS [for, behold, this column is already such an institution, it has acquired an unfeasible acronym], obviously, I am a feminist, for what right-thinking individual is not? Accordingly, I have spent a lifetime judiciously splitting each bill for dinner/the theatre/contraception that has come my way, even when my partner-in-crime earned twice, five, even ten times as much. And, yet, of late, I find myself keeping a mental tally – doing the math, if you will – and have come to the conclusion that any more of this will break me.”

Our correspondent continues: “Before any date at which there might legitimately be expected to be a sexual encounter, I will have invested in: manicure, pedicure, waxing, some sort of hairstyle, new knickers, frock, etc, in addition to having lost working hours to a bathing/buffing/beautifying routine.

“I realise I’m a tad long in the tooth to be going all Doris Day, but, frankly, if the patriarchal system demands such investment, then the patriarch in question should be prepared to shell out for a bowl of pasta. Sure, I’ll go Dutch, but only if he’s prepared to go Dutch on my highlights regime.”

Anecdotal evidence from The World of Straight Men regarding pre-date spend garnered reactions from “Rien” to “I don’t understand the question.” One response will stand for all: “Other than supper, the only thing I tend to lay out for is the occasional tube of athlete’s foot ointment, but only if I really like the woman.” Ah, romance.

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