Francesca Steele
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It is 10pm on a cold Friday and I am standing in a phonebox that smells of pee, trying to persuade a barman to track down my friends. “Can't you do a shout-out?” I ask. “Or maybe look for them?” The friends I'm supposed to meet are on a pub crawl in Central London and we haven't made any firm arrangements. “They're about 26,” I yell over the music. “And, er, probably wearing suits.” The barman disappears for a few minutes. Then: “Hey, I think I've found them!” A voice comes on the line. “Er, hi. This is Richard. Who is this?” Wrong person. I hang up.
Welcome to life in the 21st century without a mobile phone. A recent study has discovered that we are so dependent on our phones that when we find ourselves without them, discover that the battery has run out or are forced to switch them off, 53 per cent of us experience acute anxiety and stress - a “condition” so prevalent that it has even been given a name, nomophobia.
But perhaps our obsession is misguided. Sure, mobiles seem practical, but back in the old days we just planned better, didn't we? People were late less often and didn't expect you always to be contactable. A life without a mobile might even be better, more organised and relaxing. But could a nomophobic survive, let alone enjoy, a week without one?
Monday: Barely have I agreed to abandon my phone for a week than it beeps loudly. I have a text. But officially I no longer have a mobile, so reluctantly I turn it off. I spend all afternoon wondering what crucial information the message contains.
I miss my evening train and will now be late for dinner out with my flatmate. I hate being late. Still, there's nothing I can do about it. A strange calm washes over me. During dinner, I realise with horror how many times I feel an itch to check my (absent) phone. “I know what you mean,” says my flatmate, as her own phone sits tantalisingly on the table in front of me. “I almost took mine to the loo with me just now to look at old texts. That's a bit sad, isn't it?”
Tuesday: On the way home I realise that I must ring my mother. I always speak to my parents when I am on the move; they complain that they never speak to me without the accompanying roar of traffic. So, back home, I settle down on the landline and chat, undisrupted, for half an hour. I make a cup of tea and make a couple more overdue catch-up calls. It's certainly more relaxing focusing on a conversation this way. But as I drift off to sleep, I am haunted by phantom text beeps.
Wednesday: I need to make a doctor's appointment before I leave for work, but the surgery is engaged for 30 minutes. I get through eventually, but am late for work. This evening I am going climbing with friends. I rush to be home between 7 and 7.20 to wait for an arranged call from a friend who may have to cancel because of work. His train is delayed, he calls late and we arrive late at the climbing centre.
Thursday: As I set off to a friend's house from work, I realise how calming it is to be incommunicado on occasion. This hour is mine. No one can disturb it, and it provides a brief period of respite between work and wherever I'm going afterwards. Until, that is, I realise that I'm not sure of my friend's address and get lost because I can't just ring and ask her.
Friday: Tonight is when you find me in that phonebox. I have just been to the theatre, where I spent ten minutes panicking in the crowded foyer in case I missed my friend, Alice, since we have forgotten to say just where we would meet. I have now called two bars, which has cost me close to £5, including the calls to directory inquiries. Before anyone had mobiles, this is what you might have done if you really, really wanted to reach someone who was out on the town and you didn't know exactly where they were. The first barman thinks I am mad. The second brings me the wrong person. And so Alice and I head to Central London, where we wander from bar to bar in the hope that we will find our friends. Fortunately, we do.
Saturday: This evening I head to a party at a bar in South London with a few friends. There is a vague plan that another friend will join us, but we keep on missing each other. By the time I leave the house we still haven't spoken so she ends up not coming. At the end of the evening I have to leave in a rush. The next day one friend is annoyed because we didn't say goodbye and she didn't know where I had gone and couldn't ring me. I get the impression that this is an experiment that everyone else is very keen to be over. So am I.
Monday morning, 12.01: At last! I switch on my phone, eager to see what vital/hilarious text messages I have been sent. There are none, unless you count “Hey dude, what's up?” as a key exchange of information. But I am no longer fooled by the supposed benefits of a phoneless existence. The reality is that you end up waiting in the cold, being stood up and letting people down.
I admit it: my name is Francesca, and I am a nomophobic. And as for all the anxiety and stress that we addicts are supposed to suffer when deprived of our drug, the answer is simple. I will just keep my phone with me at all times. And I won't turn it off. Ever.
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This is really not about me! I haven't got landline, so my mobile is the only way to get in touch whatever the purpose is. I'm not at all hooked to cell phone, still I can't live without it because I need it for work.
Christina, Samara, Russia
"But I am no longer fooled by the supposed benefits of a phoneless existence."
It should be pointed out that it's hard to exist with out a mobile unless you remember that you need to make firm comitments and stick to them; and if you can convince your friends to do this. Something the writer didn't make any effort to do during her whole mobile-free week.
The writer failed to plan for predictible eventualities because she's used to not having to. Fancy not knowing a friends address. And was having to look around a crowded theatre foyer really that much of a hardship? You end up doing that pretty much even with a mobile phone anyway ("I'm next to the red curtains." "Which red curtains?".
The writer couples this with the uncontested view that none of these problems exist if you have got a mobile; people do switch them off sometime you know, or reception is bad, and so you can even be left out in the cold when meeting up with people with mobiles.
Meg, London.,
Always remember tha you CAN turn it off! You do not have to be at the beck and call of anyone that might want to contact you (unless required to be contactable for work, during working hours). Then, you could enjoy whatever else you are doing, uninterrupted, and check for messages once or twice a day.
Paul, Birmingham, UK
Having lived in both eras (Pre-mobile and Mobile) I can truthfully say I can take or leave it. A mobile isn't called an electronic dog leash for nothing. Ninety per cent of all my calls are useless; they're just ringing to see where I am or they're bored with whatever it is they're doing. I much prefer to be out of the loop than constantly pestered, bothered and nagged at from afar.
As for the cost, if you're like me, the cost of owning a mobile is much more than the cost of using payphones. I don't make 5 calls a month out, and so the cost per phone call for me is well over £5 a call ($10 each).
I'm MUCH more dependent on OTHER people being available instantly for me than I am in wanting constant contact with others, so I could give up my phone happily, but I don't want others to give up theirs.
alice, salado, us/tx
I thoroughly enjoy having my mobile off and the odd time that the battery goes dead while I'm away from a charger, I do relax and simply get on with the day. This is one of the reasons I am disappointed that calls can now be taken on flights - it was the last sanctuary of peace.
James, Dubai, Dubai
I find myself having a short panic when I have left my mbobile at home but then enjoy the peace without it. I realize it's a marvelous thing to have but I am tired of seeing people walking around (and driving) with a phone constantly glued to their ears. Not to mention the constant ringing and noises these phones make when out in a public place. These devices are always touted as making our lives so much better yet they actually complicate and cost us more money, too!
R Clark, Dallas, TX
People need to feel important. Most have jobs that are repetitive and don't have much to do apart from chat about last night's telly. Now, on the train, they have a captive audience to whom they can broadcast some rubbish about what some one's doing to/whith whom.
If/when we have a major downturn and jobs are lost in massive numbers, at least we'll be able to travel in peace as most of the office jockeys will be at home - seeking work, via their mobiles, perhaps....
John, London,
This article just demonstrates how disorganised Francesca Steele and her social circle are. More importantly, people like me who hate mobiles are forced to listen to their inane and turgid chatter wherever we go.
John Tomlinson, Brentwood, UK
I'm very pleased to see that my fellow readers above have had the same reaction to this article as myself. What is wrong with being organised? Our 'ancestors' 20 years ago didn't have to rely on mobiles phones, and I really don't think that did them any harm. I am 22 and never use my mobile except for absolute emergencies, as I enjoy my privacy and independence. As a society we really are getting more and more lazy, more rude, and less considerate of others; this article simply illustrates a very pertinent truth.
CM, Doncaster,
Victor, your views seems to fit somewhere between mad and sad. Nobody loves being isolated and lonely. Life is for living and not sitting at home planning and organising living it.
Having said that, I only tend to check my phone about twice a day (unless situations such as the above happen and I'm expecting a call) and return calls as and when it suits me. I guess that means I have balance between enjoying peace and quiet and the ability to get in touch.
Ivana, London,
I can see that a mobile phone would be useful when the bus breaks down or the train is late. But otherwise they are just a nuisance, giving others no chance to read on trains (and now, heaven help us, on planes!). None of the loud, un-ignorable conversations seem to be urgent, so why can't people wait until they meet, or phone from home?
Emilia, North Yorkshire,
It's terribly easy to live without a mobile. Buy one for true emergencies, charge it with 10 quid, then throw it, turned off, into the bottom of your handbag. A couple of times a year, you might have to fish it out, but mostly it will live quite happily there. Don't give people the number. In the meantime, live local for shopping and chores, make proper arrangements and stick to them, have friends with whom you actually spend time and talk. Much more satisfying! A mobile phone is a useful tool for some situations, not a way of life.
Margot, London, UK
None of this occurs if you run your life in an orderly manner, always arrive early for appointments, only cultivate real friendships rather than "pub-buddies" and reduce your activities beyond work to give yourself time to THINK. Stop rushing around like a "sparrow on speed". And truly, the only time mobiles are necessary are when driving, against calling a friend or a mechanic or when you are camping in the wilderness and might need emergency aid. Of course they don't work then. I have never had a mobile and I love being isolated in this way. Even on my land line most of the calls are SPAM or from people I DON'T wish to hear from. And, I am not cooking my brain with sound waves. I note that many of my friends with mobile phones seem to have perpetual sniffles, and to be getting more than a little crazy. Mobiles, you don't need them. Either you control your environment or it controls you. Just be prepared.
victor compton, Cherbourg, France
I just tell people they are free to phone my desk at any time they want, as outside working hours that is where my mobile is.
Whe I see families out walking by the beach all texting or phoning I wonder why they didn't stay at home. There seems to be little interaction in public these days, even just acknowledging other people in the street.
As a household with no calendar, no watches and no clocks, I can see the church clock, I should probably go back into my cave.
John, Tiverton, Devon
mobile phones have gradually become one of the most parts of our everyday life.I am now a college student,and live far away from home.When I miss my parents,I will give a ring to them no matter where I am. And messages do help for me to communicate with my old friends,because we students can't afford to pay for the price of ringing.so I think I could not live without mobile phones.
li meng, nanjing, china
interesting but as you say before people just made better arrangements and stuck to them. you havent foccussed much on the negative sides, like being on call 2/7 or people using texts to communicate where in the past we spoke or even wrote letters.
without doubt the mobile phone is a double edged sword - it gives us the contact hence the anxiety when its missing, but also puts us on 24 hour call and the feeling of being 24 hour electronically tagged.
andy anderson, rousse, bulgaria
I manage to work freelance without a mobile phone. I had one but then my clients interrupted even my free time at the weekends and, for me, there is more to life than just work. My clients know that my office hours are 8 a.m. to 5 p.m. and that is the best time to ring me. On my landline phone.
As Virginia in Brisbane pointed out, people with mobile phones think it is okay not to turn up on time. "Oh, I'll just give them a call and tell them I'll be half an hour late." Great, and what happens when the other person is on time? What are we to do with this half an hour? Just because we know the other person will be late does not mean we can do anything with the time. We can't wander off in case they turn up after 20 minutes and they WE will be accused of being late if we come back to the meeting point after the 30 minutes.
Oh, it's all too, too horrid. Oh.. and the worst thing is people talking to you while defecating. I'd rather not talk to them at all in that case.
Tina, Dusseldorf, Germany
I sleep with my mobile on bedside table and have a peek at messages even when am half asleep but that doesn't means I cant live without it. (though my friends think m 'hooked' to it)....Every now & then,i just take off without worrying about who might be calling me. It gives a sense of peace and freedon that is priceless. Though a week without my phone would just kill me! It actually makes you feel very lonely. (As i felt on a trip to 'connect' with nature to Ladakh, where there is very limited mobile connectivity)
And this is why i don't buy a blackberry. That would be suicidal!
Pallavi, Delhi, India
I run an international business and I have a Mobile phone...so far all that seems logical.
Only one problem for my customers. They know that I only switch it on when I'm travelling and then of course I have no idea of the phone number itself.....I tell them if you want to contact me only do so if very very important and to do so call the office and they will inform me.
At least I can discuss matters with people in meetings, chat with friends at the restaurant without spending 70% of my time on the phone.
Have you ever evesdropped on mobile phone calls ? I can tell what is said could have gone without saying it. I see people in supermarkets phoning home asking which brand of mash potatoes they should buy.
But 90% of the calls are to say that you will be late. How about just turning up on time.
E. Bee, Toulouse, France
I am the last remaining, fully functional, well-off-person-that-is-not-yet-a-senior-citizen to have never bought a cell phone. I am still hoping that it will all just blow over. I do have high-speed internet though....
Ian, Washington, DC
Absolutely pathetic!
John Thrale, Troche, France
Absolutely yes yes yes. My enemy is the mobile. l hate the sound of it, the look of it and l would hate to own one. When i am out, driving, eating my lunch, having a coffee break, looking round the stores, l would absolutely hate to be interrrupted by anyone. ln that way, l am not accountable to anyone and no one interrupts me. When l am with someone, l like to give my undivided attention to that person and talk to that person instead of going out with someone and talk to a machine. l think the mobile phone has increased everyone's rudeness. People prefer to speak to a machine instead of a live human being. Also people addicted to mobiles do not like to make a commitment, whether it is meeting at a certain place at a certain time. Here we can clearly see the flaw in human characters and we have a lot to learn from animals. They are so happy and content, next thing we will be having sex with someone thousands of miles away or am l still in the dark about that one!
virginia, Brisbane, Australia